Family.

Dear Dady..

When i was child, i always imagine that i will have a perfect family with the perfect parents in this world, so thats why i pretend that i am the strogest child because i have to be a shield for my dady and my mom.

They are so workaholic if i can say, i stay in my home and my parents go to sale their own shop..

Even i am so lonely but i waiting them to back home.

day by day passed..
now i have 2 sister and 2 brother and actually i am so happy to have them, i grew up with my parents, my sister/brother,  my etek, my  grandma and my grandpa..
i think my happy family will be so perfect untill one day..
my mom and my dad fight and they divorce..

i dont know whats wrong with my happy family??

my mom go with the other guy, and my dad so disappointed with my mom..

my dady tell me like crazy guy..

i was 9 years old..

i dont know what i have to do...

i am so lonely..

i want to crying but i cant.

i dont want to make my sister and my brother crying too..

i have to strong because i am the oldest sister!

but..

i heard the bad news who makes me so crazy..

My yougest sister was passed away..

i was 9 years old..

and i dont know what i have to say to Yola,Ipan and Dani..

i just say everything will be okay..

i cant tell everyone.

i have to keep strong with my own power..

and how about my mom?

she ran away with her new husband..

what a broken life. i just life like in the hell.

i dont want people give me a sympaty, and tell the bad news about my family again..

i just keep silent, give the beautifull smile and laughing like a fool child..

If everyone knows what i feel, they will coment and hate my parents more i cant accept it.

Years by years passed..
my dady take care of me and my sister brother, he work so hard..
he work start from morning until 1 a.m 
every night i waited my father and i cried after that alone..
i just want to say " dady, please take a reset just for today"
but, i cant..
i dont want to crying in front of my dad, i want my dady know that i am strong and can take care of my sister and my 2 brother alone.
i can cooking rice and everything with kompor..
i can save money that you gave to me for emergency..
i can clean my family shirt.
i can take care of our home.
so dont worry.

Now..

My mom came to me and ask me and my sister brother to forgive her..

Honestly, one moment i cant forgive her.

but, i have to forgive her..

because she is my mom..

she gave me, Ipan, Yola, dani and Dinda a Birth..

Dady, if i have to say..

thanks to be my the best Father in this world..

i am  really sorry, i was made many mistake..

but i'll trying hard to make you proud of me. 

i love you papa..